Thursday, September 11, 2008

Seeking purpose

Sharing photos from July
My baby with G-man

My boys in motion .... two of my three most favourite dudes in the world.

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Now that it's all over, what did you really do yesterday that's worth mentioning?
~Coleman Cox

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After sending G-man yesterdays Daily Motivator entitled Good and Tired, we had the following email 'chat' ...
G-man : Hmm, its like our comment of feeling hung over, if only we had been drinking….
Sassy : Agreed. Constant nagging hangover!
All this ‘purpose’ talk … I read the Purpose Driven Life twice and beyond being a mother and earning an income to help support the kids, I honestly have no clue beyond that what my purpose in the world is … I never feel as though I’m making a great difference, or adding a huge value … I’ve tried the Christian route to find my purpose, have thought about what I enjoy doing, but don’t find myself excited or ‘wanting’ to purpose (I still don't now what I meant to say, so I've chosen to leave it in) it all on a daily basis, that leaves me asking where do I find what my purpose is???
There has to be more to life and at some point, I want to turn around and feel in myself that I’m doing something worthwhile! I need more, but I don’t know what!

G-man : Shew, your hassle is shared by me. I try find it in the working environment but never succeed!
I have downgraded the purpose to being selfish and doing as much enjoyable stuff as I can and making others happy.
What if our purpose is to be there to give others a purpose?
Someone has to be cannon fodder?!!!!!

Sassy : If ones purpose would be to give another purpose, then you must at least feel fulfilled.

G-man : Hmm, does the buck in the lions jaws go “aaah, fulfilment”?
Think not!
Doesn’t life and its detail help detract. Think of it this way – how many great philosophers and guru’s came up with these great proposals while running a household and bringing up a few kids???? As I picture it they disappear for solitude, climb mountains and live in caves or go on fasts to get the great esoterical answers. The rest of us are ants running in our mundane ruts all the time.

Sassy : But we’re not animals, we’ve humans!
So in fact, to find purpose and fulfillment we should be climbing mountains, living in caves and fasting!! Hmmm … sounds wonderful … can’t I rather just travel the world First Class and on someone else’s expense … lol .. maybe THAT’S my purpose.

The conversation pretty much ended there with a little back and forwards banter, but in the recessesof my mind, it’s been playing over and over and over … I woke up so tired, after the first night of not being woken by someone coughing, or G-man telling the dogs to shut up and it was the first thing I thought of. I need to find some fulfilment and the purpose of my existence. I have to, ‘cause I’m losing it here, boredom, frustration, discontent is settling into my bones and it’s not a good feeling.

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Thanks again, Wendy